I come from a long line of "waste not - want not" women. But what used to make sense to me, now does not. I remember as a child daydreaming that I would open a whole-foods store, and sell everything in bulk - bring your own container. I envisioned everyone lining up with their empty 16 ounce shampoo bottle and refilling it out of the tap for a quarter. I might have two brands - one for oily hair and one for dry hair. Milk - I always thought "Oh what a waste, they made this whole gallon jug just to hold milk for a week, then you throw it away?" So I was going to let them refill their containers out of a milk tap. I think I imagined the other end of the tap being connected directly to the teats of a cow. Anyway. My whole point is that we have containers for everything. And those containers are only used once for that product. Then they go to the landfill. Thousands of empty milk jugs daily in each landfill. So, as a solution, I had decided that I would not throw away the empty bowls, jugs, jars, bread bags, or containers of any sort. The milk jugs were refilled with water for winter watering purposes or used as trot-line floats. I never accumulated many of them, since we milked our own animals. This noble idea culminated in an obscene cabinet collection of bowls of all shapes and sorts, and a drawer full of lids. The manufacturers don't even have enough respect for the environment to make the containers uniform across like products. For instance: Why won't a cool-whip lid fit a margarine bowl? I like products that use mason jars with standard mouths so that I can buy rings and lids and re-use the jar. I think meat should come wrapped in paper instead of foam trays. Soda? Why can't we buy our own syrup and carbonation tap? Aah. Because then they couldn't get a dollar-twenty-nine for every 16 ounce plastic throw-away bottle. (and it's .89 for a 2-litre on sale, go figure.)
I grew to hate the cabinet full of bowls and drawer full of lids. It was frustrating to match two pieces together, and sometimes by opening the cabinet, I was treated to a plastic avalanche. I called it sabotage and I looked for the culprit to kill him/her/them.
So now I'm older and I do not tolerate any plastic bowl in my cupboard without it's matching lid being paired with it and stacked with others of like capacity or shape. I'm like the tupperware nazi. Husband has learned to conform.
I am ruthless. I throw bowls away if I can't see the lid. I throw the lid away if I can't find the bowl. This has simplified my life sooo much. I feel so much more comfortable in my kitchen when I know I can just reach up and grab a container with a lid and not have to worry about the booby-trap crashing down on my head.
I went to a friends' home last weekend and helped with the cooking. I opened a cabinet and the tupperware bowls came tumbling out and they knocked over a drink that was "safely" sitting on the counter, and I secretly smiled to myself.
MsAmber
Bad Poetry?
- MsAmber
- I am complex, yet simple. I am hearty and frail. I am selfish and generous. I let my emotions prevail. I want to make some sense of it. Of Life, and Love, and God. I want to bring back the simple things. I know that makes me odd. But if you'll stay and read awhile maybe you'll start to see. Then maybe I can share with you a little part of me. MsAmber
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
I Hate Amoxicillin!
SIDE EFFECTS: Side effects due to amoxicillin include diarrhea, dizziness, heartburn, insomnia, nausea, itching, vomiting, confusion, abdominal pain, easy bruising, bleeding, rash and allergic reactions.
Confusion? Well that explains my losing my temper with a clearinghouse representative who was telling me what we needed in certain loops and segments of an electronic claim via our processors. I started writing it down, and after about the 6th item I abruptly stopped him and said "Can you just email me the companion document?"
Dizziness? That's what I'm taking it for. I have an inner ear infection and tonsillitis, and it's causing me to be dizzy when I stand up or turn around. Like a mild vertigo.Abdominal pain? Yep. That explains why it hurts to press here, and here, and here.
Diarrhea? Check.
Heartburn, nausea? Hell, that's normal for me. I have an ulcer.
I don't have the insomnia, itching, vomiting, easy bruising, bleeding, rash or allergic reaction. I suppose I should be grateful. Or maybe they just haven't started yet. I'm only on day ONE.
This is the second time I've ever thought the cure was worse than the disease.
The antibiotic regimen given for H.Pylori ranks right up there with the worse stuff you could ever take to "cure" an ill.
Can anyone tell me why all my muscles are sore? All I have is tonsillitis and an ear infection. So why does it feel like I've been beat up by a bunch of Lilliputians? That's not on the list of side effects, and I wasn't sore before I took them.
I'm going to feed the dogs and go to bed.
MsAmber
Monday, January 30, 2006
May This House Be Safe From Tigers
I know I've mentioned to most of you how I have been searching for a long lost literary favorite. "May This House Be Safe From Tigers" by Alexander King.
I found it on Amazon, and instead of buying the cheaper paperback edition, I went all out and purchased a 1960 First Printing, hardcover with the original dust jacket. It's awesome. It cost $18.55 total, including shipping. I couldn't be happier with it.
I've already started re-reading it. This book is so funny and wonderful, I really wish everyone would read it.
Alexander King was a very interesting man. He lived in New York's Greenwich Village before it was marketed as a bohemian paradise. He was an Austrian boy who came to America when he was just a boy in the early 20th century. He starts out with his anecdote about the title:
My friend Norman Prelick happens to be a Zen Buddhist at the moment. He used to be a Communist once.
It figures.
But suddenly, a couple of years ago, he saw the true light and since then he's been thoroughly illuminated.
At any rate, every time this character comes to visit me and finally gets ready to leave, he stops in the doorway, folds his hands Hindu fashion, lowers his fourth-dimensional eyelids and says:
"May this house be safe from tigers."
He does this every time.
The other day, when his senseless little orison had fallen on me again, I said to him, "What is the meaning of this idiot prayer you're always uttering over me every time you leave here? What the hell does it mean, anyway?"
Norman looked surprised and even a little hurt, and finally he gave off the familiar long-suffering sigh of the frequently misunderstood.
"What's wrong with my prayer?" he said. "How long have I been saying it to you?"
"Oh, about three years, on and off."
"Three years," he said. "Well--been bothered by any tigers lately?"
Perfectly correct.
So, since it is surely one of the most effective benedictions I have ever encountered, I've decided to share this powerful and potent spell with the rest of the world.
I Love this book. So glad to have it safe on my bookshelf once again.
MsAmber
I found it on Amazon, and instead of buying the cheaper paperback edition, I went all out and purchased a 1960 First Printing, hardcover with the original dust jacket. It's awesome. It cost $18.55 total, including shipping. I couldn't be happier with it.
I've already started re-reading it. This book is so funny and wonderful, I really wish everyone would read it.
Alexander King was a very interesting man. He lived in New York's Greenwich Village before it was marketed as a bohemian paradise. He was an Austrian boy who came to America when he was just a boy in the early 20th century. He starts out with his anecdote about the title:
My friend Norman Prelick happens to be a Zen Buddhist at the moment. He used to be a Communist once.
It figures.
But suddenly, a couple of years ago, he saw the true light and since then he's been thoroughly illuminated.
At any rate, every time this character comes to visit me and finally gets ready to leave, he stops in the doorway, folds his hands Hindu fashion, lowers his fourth-dimensional eyelids and says:
"May this house be safe from tigers."
He does this every time.
The other day, when his senseless little orison had fallen on me again, I said to him, "What is the meaning of this idiot prayer you're always uttering over me every time you leave here? What the hell does it mean, anyway?"
Norman looked surprised and even a little hurt, and finally he gave off the familiar long-suffering sigh of the frequently misunderstood.
"What's wrong with my prayer?" he said. "How long have I been saying it to you?"
"Oh, about three years, on and off."
"Three years," he said. "Well--been bothered by any tigers lately?"
Perfectly correct.
So, since it is surely one of the most effective benedictions I have ever encountered, I've decided to share this powerful and potent spell with the rest of the world.
I Love this book. So glad to have it safe on my bookshelf once again.
MsAmber
Thursday, January 26, 2006
Accountability, or "Oh, you poor little rich girl."
Women. Silly women. Unaccountable women.
I have very little tolerance for them.
I'm looking for a female friend who shares some of the same ideals.
I don't believe in equality of the sexes. I believe in the equality of individuals.
Honestly - don't you get sick of the whole "Toilet Seat up or down" battle?
If there are more women in the house than men, sure. It's only polite. If there are more men in the house than women, then the seat should stay up. The majority should be convenienced.
But no. Most women think that by virtue of their delicate behinds, that the toilet seat should always be placed "just so" so that they never have to look where they sit. I would think that we should ALL look where we are going to sit. A wet behind is your own darn fault.
I have witnessed, in my 35 years, at least 20 serious fights over the subject. A group of people could be having a little party, everyone is enjoying themselves, and BAM! Some uppity chick comes out of the bathroom and wants to start a row over the fact that she found the toilet seat up and nearly dunked her backside in the toilet bowl.
I'm a woman, and sometimes I want to go put the seat up just to see somebody get their nose bent out of shape over it. It's ridiculous. It tells me that the girl doesn't have anything more important on her mind than her own tushie.
I have another friend who married for money. She doesn't have to work, so she has no personal validation. She has low self-esteem, and she drives a Porsche. Obviously, her tushie is worth more than most womens'. I tell her to count her blessings, and idle hands are the devil's tools: get a job. Her husband has been hurting her feelings and she's ready to move out. She's bawling that he has no right to tear her down. I warned her to marry for friendship, not money. She made her decision based on an imagined life of leisure, and her self-esteem problem would go away if she did something to validate her existence. Freakin' deal with it. Use your newfound powers for good - Sell the damn Porsche, go to school, and feed some poor kids. She won't. She just wants me to pat her on the back and tell her she's worthy. She is another "equality of the sexes" garbage spewer.
Dear Abby recently had a woman write that she was moving her husband's revered antique automobile and had a fender-bender. The husband got angry and told her to get out because she always ruins everything. Abby responded that the man was wrong, he should have been grateful that the wife wasn't hurt, that the car could be fixed, and he should value his wife more.
HA! I disagree. The statement: "she always ruins everything." says volumes to me. Why was this incompetent little twit even touching his antique automobile? Based on his reaction, I'm sure he didn't ask her to. I envision this scenario:
Stupid little wife has a habit of breaking and ruining anything that she, herself, didn't earn, buy, make, or provide. She also isn't responsible enough to even rectify her mistakes. "Oops, I'm sorry, giggle giggle." So, after years of little mishaps like: spilling bleach on his favorite jacket, letting the cat scratch up his speaker covers (The pioneer ones he bought in college), letting the kids play with his guitar, leaving his car windows down in the rain, and other dunderheaded acts of destruction, THEN she decides she wants to clean out the garage while he's at work. So she goes and gets the keys and not only bumps the edge of the garage, but skids all the way down the car with a great big grating noise while the paint rips all the way from the bumper to the handle on the passenger door. "Oops, giggle giggle" she says.
Husband comes home. Gets mad. She doesn't feel that he should get mad at her for any reason, since she's his wife, and she yells back at him that the car is more important than her, and she fires off a letter to Dear Abby so the whole world will say: "Oh, you poor girl."
I, first off, would have been more careful in moving my husband's favorite antique car. Secondly, IF I had a fender bender, I would have the estimates on the new fender and the paint job, and I would even throw in a bonus improvement, like "Hey, I also found the new tail-light covers you wanted." And the job would be done and paid for without an ounce of inconvenience to my husband, I would sell a kidney to make it happen, and never complain about the pain.
In no way would my husband EVER be able to say that I "ruined everything", or didn't make it right. That's why I say Dear Abby was wrong.
That's Accountability.
Until Women are as accountable for their actions as they expect their Men to be, they cannot spew their equality bullchip at me. Meanwhile, it's just a silly excuse to get huffy over something that they cannot control.
Girl, stick your arm down that sewer and retrieve your tampon that plugged up the pipe. Get out there and adjust your valves, you can hear them clacking just as well as I can. Ride your own motorcycle. Change your own flat tire/radiator hose/air filter/brake pads. Fix your own wiring. Program your own remote. Take responsibility for your own mistakes and decisions.
Then you can be MY equal.
MsAmber
I have very little tolerance for them.
I'm looking for a female friend who shares some of the same ideals.
I don't believe in equality of the sexes. I believe in the equality of individuals.
Honestly - don't you get sick of the whole "Toilet Seat up or down" battle?
If there are more women in the house than men, sure. It's only polite. If there are more men in the house than women, then the seat should stay up. The majority should be convenienced.
But no. Most women think that by virtue of their delicate behinds, that the toilet seat should always be placed "just so" so that they never have to look where they sit. I would think that we should ALL look where we are going to sit. A wet behind is your own darn fault.
I have witnessed, in my 35 years, at least 20 serious fights over the subject. A group of people could be having a little party, everyone is enjoying themselves, and BAM! Some uppity chick comes out of the bathroom and wants to start a row over the fact that she found the toilet seat up and nearly dunked her backside in the toilet bowl.
I'm a woman, and sometimes I want to go put the seat up just to see somebody get their nose bent out of shape over it. It's ridiculous. It tells me that the girl doesn't have anything more important on her mind than her own tushie.
I have another friend who married for money. She doesn't have to work, so she has no personal validation. She has low self-esteem, and she drives a Porsche. Obviously, her tushie is worth more than most womens'. I tell her to count her blessings, and idle hands are the devil's tools: get a job. Her husband has been hurting her feelings and she's ready to move out. She's bawling that he has no right to tear her down. I warned her to marry for friendship, not money. She made her decision based on an imagined life of leisure, and her self-esteem problem would go away if she did something to validate her existence. Freakin' deal with it. Use your newfound powers for good - Sell the damn Porsche, go to school, and feed some poor kids. She won't. She just wants me to pat her on the back and tell her she's worthy. She is another "equality of the sexes" garbage spewer.
Dear Abby recently had a woman write that she was moving her husband's revered antique automobile and had a fender-bender. The husband got angry and told her to get out because she always ruins everything. Abby responded that the man was wrong, he should have been grateful that the wife wasn't hurt, that the car could be fixed, and he should value his wife more.
HA! I disagree. The statement: "she always ruins everything." says volumes to me. Why was this incompetent little twit even touching his antique automobile? Based on his reaction, I'm sure he didn't ask her to. I envision this scenario:
Stupid little wife has a habit of breaking and ruining anything that she, herself, didn't earn, buy, make, or provide. She also isn't responsible enough to even rectify her mistakes. "Oops, I'm sorry, giggle giggle." So, after years of little mishaps like: spilling bleach on his favorite jacket, letting the cat scratch up his speaker covers (The pioneer ones he bought in college), letting the kids play with his guitar, leaving his car windows down in the rain, and other dunderheaded acts of destruction, THEN she decides she wants to clean out the garage while he's at work. So she goes and gets the keys and not only bumps the edge of the garage, but skids all the way down the car with a great big grating noise while the paint rips all the way from the bumper to the handle on the passenger door. "Oops, giggle giggle" she says.
Husband comes home. Gets mad. She doesn't feel that he should get mad at her for any reason, since she's his wife, and she yells back at him that the car is more important than her, and she fires off a letter to Dear Abby so the whole world will say: "Oh, you poor girl."
I, first off, would have been more careful in moving my husband's favorite antique car. Secondly, IF I had a fender bender, I would have the estimates on the new fender and the paint job, and I would even throw in a bonus improvement, like "Hey, I also found the new tail-light covers you wanted." And the job would be done and paid for without an ounce of inconvenience to my husband, I would sell a kidney to make it happen, and never complain about the pain.
In no way would my husband EVER be able to say that I "ruined everything", or didn't make it right. That's why I say Dear Abby was wrong.
That's Accountability.
Until Women are as accountable for their actions as they expect their Men to be, they cannot spew their equality bullchip at me. Meanwhile, it's just a silly excuse to get huffy over something that they cannot control.
Girl, stick your arm down that sewer and retrieve your tampon that plugged up the pipe. Get out there and adjust your valves, you can hear them clacking just as well as I can. Ride your own motorcycle. Change your own flat tire/radiator hose/air filter/brake pads. Fix your own wiring. Program your own remote. Take responsibility for your own mistakes and decisions.
Then you can be MY equal.
MsAmber
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Epiphany
Definition of:
epiphany - A realization or comprehension of the essence or meaning of something.
Epiphany- A Christian feast (The visiting of the three Kings to Jesus)
The Feast Of Epiphany is a fascinating and fun holiday. It is celebrated with a number of traditions. One is the "swim for the cross". A Catholic humpty-hump blesses a cross and throws it in a body of water, the men swim for it, and the person who touches it first will have good health for the coming year. (Everybody else dies of pneumonia?)
Another tradition is ice-water baptism. Especially in the former Soviet Union and other "Polar" regions. Weather notwithstanding, thousands of Catholics take part in this Epiphany tradition.
There is a cold snap in the Ukraine right now. Minus 30 degrees fahrenheit. Very cold.
These are some seriously stout people. Check out the old lady below. Is that cool or what?
She just walked through icewater while it's -30 degrees outside. A little bit below my tolerance levels for cold. Bbrrrr!
epiphany - A realization or comprehension of the essence or meaning of something.
Epiphany- A Christian feast (The visiting of the three Kings to Jesus)
The Feast Of Epiphany is a fascinating and fun holiday. It is celebrated with a number of traditions. One is the "swim for the cross". A Catholic humpty-hump blesses a cross and throws it in a body of water, the men swim for it, and the person who touches it first will have good health for the coming year. (Everybody else dies of pneumonia?)
Another tradition is ice-water baptism. Especially in the former Soviet Union and other "Polar" regions. Weather notwithstanding, thousands of Catholics take part in this Epiphany tradition.
There is a cold snap in the Ukraine right now. Minus 30 degrees fahrenheit. Very cold.
These are some seriously stout people. Check out the old lady below. Is that cool or what?
She just walked through icewater while it's -30 degrees outside. A little bit below my tolerance levels for cold. Bbrrrr!
This kind of religious "zealotry" is admirable, in my oh-so-humble opinion. This is beautiful. The collective state of mind for a society of hard working bread and butter people. I also think it's good for you to shock your system once in a while, but wouldn't you be a little worried if that were YOUR grandma? 
This guy is definitely having an Epiphany right about now.
Happy Feast of the Three Kings, Ya'll.
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Your results:
You are Wonder Woman
Click here to take the "Which Superhero am I?" quiz...
I AM WonderWoman. You don't understand... I really AM. The reason I am 5'1" and blonde is because Linda Carter did some voodoo on me, and we switched bodies.
Look, I even use the official lunchbox. See? If that isn't proof enough.
You are Wonder Woman
| You are a beautiful princess with great strength of character.  |
Click here to take the "Which Superhero am I?" quiz...
I AM WonderWoman. You don't understand... I really AM. The reason I am 5'1" and blonde is because Linda Carter did some voodoo on me, and we switched bodies.
Look, I even use the official lunchbox. See? If that isn't proof enough.
I love my WonderWoman lunchbox. My husband packs my surprise lunch nearly every day. Yesterday he packed a sliced orange, a fried apple pie, and a cotto salami sandwich on wheat. I like setting my lunchbox on the top shelf of the refrigerator at work, with the face looking at you when you open the door. Everybody else is just too chicken to bring their lunch in a cool lunchbox like mine.
They can have their tape-labelled plain old ugly tupperware. I'm just gonna keep being cool and carrying my official, vintage, grade-A condition, WonderWoman lunchbox. (It also looks cool with my pink furbag purse, and my pink furry guitar strap.)
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Monday, January 23, 2006
I came home from work this evening, and Brinka was in the backyard, Megabyte was inside the house. I opened the back door, the sun is going down and it's about 64 degrees out, so I thought: "I can leave it for a moment, I will be right back.", and ran to the restroom. I did my toiletries, and brushed my hair, then I went across the hallway into my bedroom, and changed my clothes into my flannel night pants and a t-shirt. When I emerged, I hadn't been gone 5 minutes total, the house was trashed.
Apparently, SOME dog has dug a large hole next to the kennel door, and dumped the water tub into it, for a perfectly WONDERFUL mud puddle.You must know that it has been so dry outside of late, that we have burn bans in effect, and everyone's yards have turned into dust. They don't call this the dust bowl for nothin'.
My dogs are soooo smart, that they figured out how to make a mud puddle. Who needs opposable thumbs for that?
Their intelligence has a downside however. I now must HOSE them both down like the criminals they are, then make them lay in one place without MOVING! until I get the kitchen floor mopped and the carpet shampoo'd. This could take upward of 30 minutes, whereas they must lay there with their ears bent back and guilty wet doggy looks on their faces.
Yep, then, and only then, will I feel satisfied and vindicated. They better be extra pathetic looking this evening.
Do you see the mud in the indoor water bucket? That means; they ran out of wet muddy paws so they dipped them in the inside bucket to make more tracks. This was completely premeditated. Don't think I'm giving them too much credit. These are the same dogs that have to sit when they come in from the rain and get wiped down. The same dogs that watch me mop, and vaccuum, and clean every day.
They better be extra pathetic while I clean this mess up. I'm tellin' ya. They are this close to me tying a broom to one of their tails and a mop to the other one's, so they can help me sweep and mop while they wag.
I already have the cats dusting.
MsAmber
It's A Monday
It's a whole new week.
The sun is shining. It's about 65 degrees outside. I brought the dog (Brinka) to work with me this morning. My veterinarian is directly across the street from my work. Brinka was a pill. She felt threatened by the boss, and gave him a very abrupt warning this morning. Not funny. Well, OK, it was funny.
Gosh. I've taken two calls since I started typing this entry. My computer is tied up right now uploading an update. One of the clearinghouses wants to start testing with our fake claims, GoToAssist wants to setup one of our machines to test their product. I have two computers at my desk and both are engaged.
I will have to sign off and write more later.
It's a Monday!
MsAmber
The sun is shining. It's about 65 degrees outside. I brought the dog (Brinka) to work with me this morning. My veterinarian is directly across the street from my work. Brinka was a pill. She felt threatened by the boss, and gave him a very abrupt warning this morning. Not funny. Well, OK, it was funny.
Gosh. I've taken two calls since I started typing this entry. My computer is tied up right now uploading an update. One of the clearinghouses wants to start testing with our fake claims, GoToAssist wants to setup one of our machines to test their product. I have two computers at my desk and both are engaged.
I will have to sign off and write more later.
It's a Monday!
MsAmber
Thursday, January 19, 2006
I want Spring. Sunshine and bumblebees and little green things sprouting out of the recently turned dirt. The smell of lemon fresh pinesol and fabric softener wafting out the back door while I sweep the porch and set up my outdoor furniture and husband walks laps with the lawnmower.
I want to wash all the windows and pull down the drapes to re-install my summer-sheers. Put the heavy bedding away, and clear off the knick-nack shelves, and hang the clear shower curtain in the bathroom.
I want to paint everything white and clean, even the outside of the house, and whitewash the fence.
I want to wear a new pastel dress with a new hat and a new pair of silver-white pumps, and go watch children Easter egg hunting.
I want to hear the pressure cooker tittling and hissing on the stove.
I want to hear the cicadas singing in the evening, and watch the gnats' mating dances in the sunshine.
Have you ever watched the gnats' mating dance? It's fascinating, really. Groups of males will form a swarm about three to four feet above the ground. The guys will come together as a loosely formed group, and they are all vibrating at different rates. Then they start to tighten up and they get more frantic, then, at a climactic moment, the group will squeeze together and vibrate in sync with one another. Like a tornado of gnats. Then they seem to all stop and relax back into a loose group of individual gnats. These groups of gnats are just a bunch of teenage boys showing off. Then, a bigger, slower female gnat just blunders into the group, the females don't vibrate, they just look dizzy. Some lucky male collides with her and *Plink* they drop straight down to the ground to mate.
I've shown this to lots of people, and now that they can see it, they enjoy watching gnats mate too.
My favorite things to watch are dragonflies. They eat gnats. They act EXACTLY like sharks. The dragonfly will cruise through the yard hitting every group of males with his mouth open. He will make three or four passes, then land to clean off his eyes and swallow his meal, then start cruising through the swarms again. Occasionally, another dragonfly will try to eat at the buffet, and then we have a dragonfly war. They zip around and posture and threaten each other. The winner will think he has run off the competition, but the competition starts pulling drive-by raids. Zip in, snatch one or two and zip back out.Ok, I've probably just lost you all on the minute details of a bug's life. But I enjoy it.
MsAmber
7 Things Tag
7 Things To Do Before I Die:
Tour the Amazon River and swim with the native children.
Learn another language like Farsi or Portugese.
Have a shelter for wayward teens, or open a hostel.
Get my tummy into a condition that I can wear a midriff top.
(not that I WOULD wear a midriff top)
Learn to play guitar and sing ONE good song in public.
Learn to skateboard just enough to not be embarrassing to the kids.
Quit Smoking.
7 Things I Cannot Do:
Rollerblade.
Leave a homeless person to freeze by the road.
Tolerate a person who stays in an abusive relationship.
Stay inside a halloween haunted house.
Skydive without hyperventilating.
Use a handicapped toilet. (I can't pee with my feet dangling.)
Clean up somebody else's puke without puking myself.
7 Things That Attract Me To Blogging:
Reading interesting P.O.V.s
Manipulating Html and XML to make things work.
Thinking that somebody actually cares what I have to say.
Sitting at my computer in the evening instead of sitting at my TV.
Arguing without yelling.
Playing tricks on unsuspecting victims. (I'm still chuckling about the mouse test.)
Being an open book for everyone to read.
7 Things I Say Most Often:
"DadGummit!"
"Dude!"
"Fixin'" (I'm fixin' to go to the store.)
"Right-click on the Start Button and go to Explore."
"What Operating System are you using?"
"Move it Lady, the Gas pedal is the one on the right."
"Yezzum?"
7 Books I Love:
May Your House Be Free From Tigers - Alexander King
Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
The Source - James Michener
King Rat - James Clavell
Harry Potter - J.K.Rowling
Hobbit and Trilogy - J.R.R.Tolkien
Another Roadside Attraction - Tom Robbins
7 Series' I Would Watch Over And Over:
Star Trek Voyager
The Triangle
Lonesome Dove
Little House On the Prairie
Going Tribal
National Geographic Explorer
Xena - Warrior Princess
Okay - If you read this, you have been Tagged!
MsAmber
Tour the Amazon River and swim with the native children.
Learn another language like Farsi or Portugese.
Have a shelter for wayward teens, or open a hostel.
Get my tummy into a condition that I can wear a midriff top.
(not that I WOULD wear a midriff top)
Learn to play guitar and sing ONE good song in public.
Learn to skateboard just enough to not be embarrassing to the kids.
Quit Smoking.
7 Things I Cannot Do:
Rollerblade.
Leave a homeless person to freeze by the road.
Tolerate a person who stays in an abusive relationship.
Stay inside a halloween haunted house.
Skydive without hyperventilating.
Use a handicapped toilet. (I can't pee with my feet dangling.)
Clean up somebody else's puke without puking myself.
7 Things That Attract Me To Blogging:
Reading interesting P.O.V.s
Manipulating Html and XML to make things work.
Thinking that somebody actually cares what I have to say.
Sitting at my computer in the evening instead of sitting at my TV.
Arguing without yelling.
Playing tricks on unsuspecting victims. (I'm still chuckling about the mouse test.)
Being an open book for everyone to read.
7 Things I Say Most Often:
"DadGummit!"
"Dude!"
"Fixin'" (I'm fixin' to go to the store.)
"Right-click on the Start Button and go to Explore."
"What Operating System are you using?"
"Move it Lady, the Gas pedal is the one on the right."
"Yezzum?"
7 Books I Love:
May Your House Be Free From Tigers - Alexander King
Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
The Source - James Michener
King Rat - James Clavell
Harry Potter - J.K.Rowling
Hobbit and Trilogy - J.R.R.Tolkien
Another Roadside Attraction - Tom Robbins
7 Series' I Would Watch Over And Over:
Star Trek Voyager
The Triangle
Lonesome Dove
Little House On the Prairie
Going Tribal
National Geographic Explorer
Xena - Warrior Princess
Okay - If you read this, you have been Tagged!
MsAmber
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
The call of nature is stronger than loyalty
Here's the latest domestic fun.
I dropped by my veterinarian Thursday last, and asked for a bottle of antibiotics for Megabyte, I also mentioned that I would soon be bringing in my new german shepherd, Brinka, to get spayed and have a cyst removed from her waddle.
Friday last, she "blossomed". Of course Megabyte noticed immediately, and he started trying to romance Brinka. Husband woke at 10:00, saw a menses trail throughout the house, called me at work and we escalated the situation to CODE RED.
We started that complicated ballet called "Keep Them Apart".
I have always taken pride in the fact that my dogs are so well behaved. Any person who knows me would gladly take one of my dogs in. I spend time with them, talk to them, work with them, and teach them manners. I will get rid of a dog that won't learn or mind. I require obedience without a leash. That's my main training. I don't want them wallowing on my guests, or scaring little children who are afraid of dogs, or running out into the street.
Monday morning, I took Brinka to the vet, she had her surgeries and now her belly and neck are both shaved. Because she had already started being in heat, she still has the scent. I have to keep them separate for another week so she can heal.
Megabyte has turned into a FREAK! He won't mind, he's scratching at the door and barking, he is pacing to and fro, and he whines with every breath; a very high pitched, irritating whine that makes my ears hurt and makes me want to go kick something, and he never stops. I put him in the garage for a time-out this evening, because I swear, I couldn't take it anymore. I want to crank up the stereo to drown out his whining. When I make him lay down beside my chair, he lays there and shivvers, I can see his skin crawling. I know the poor dude has blueballs. I'm so sorry about that, I really am, but damn. Give it up!
We are going to ship Megabyte out to the Mother-in-law's farm for a week starting tomorrow. It will help him get it off his mind until I can shampoo the carpets and Brinka can heal a little.
It will also keep me from going insane and kicking my husband and divorcing my dog.
The call of nature is stronger than loyalty.
MsAmber
I dropped by my veterinarian Thursday last, and asked for a bottle of antibiotics for Megabyte, I also mentioned that I would soon be bringing in my new german shepherd, Brinka, to get spayed and have a cyst removed from her waddle.
Friday last, she "blossomed". Of course Megabyte noticed immediately, and he started trying to romance Brinka. Husband woke at 10:00, saw a menses trail throughout the house, called me at work and we escalated the situation to CODE RED.
We started that complicated ballet called "Keep Them Apart".
I have always taken pride in the fact that my dogs are so well behaved. Any person who knows me would gladly take one of my dogs in. I spend time with them, talk to them, work with them, and teach them manners. I will get rid of a dog that won't learn or mind. I require obedience without a leash. That's my main training. I don't want them wallowing on my guests, or scaring little children who are afraid of dogs, or running out into the street.
Monday morning, I took Brinka to the vet, she had her surgeries and now her belly and neck are both shaved. Because she had already started being in heat, she still has the scent. I have to keep them separate for another week so she can heal.
Megabyte has turned into a FREAK! He won't mind, he's scratching at the door and barking, he is pacing to and fro, and he whines with every breath; a very high pitched, irritating whine that makes my ears hurt and makes me want to go kick something, and he never stops. I put him in the garage for a time-out this evening, because I swear, I couldn't take it anymore. I want to crank up the stereo to drown out his whining. When I make him lay down beside my chair, he lays there and shivvers, I can see his skin crawling. I know the poor dude has blueballs. I'm so sorry about that, I really am, but damn. Give it up!
We are going to ship Megabyte out to the Mother-in-law's farm for a week starting tomorrow. It will help him get it off his mind until I can shampoo the carpets and Brinka can heal a little.
It will also keep me from going insane and kicking my husband and divorcing my dog.
The call of nature is stronger than loyalty.
MsAmber
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
What Sucks?
Mean People Suck.
Medicare Sucks.
Constantly Ringing Telephones Suck.
Menstruation Sucks.
Garbage Can Liners That You Can't Open Suck.
Childproof Bottles and Bubble packs on Midol Sucks.
People With Bad Accents Getting Impatient With Me Because I Don't Understand Them Sucks.
Tight Ass Wedding Rings That You Can't Take Off Suck.
Freakin' 30 Degree Windy Days Suck.
Brassiere Straps That Won't Stay Up Suck.
Hair In My Eyes Sucks.
Broken Cookies Suck.
Wanting Biscuits and Gravy And The Customer In Front Of You Gets The Last 2 Biscuits Sucks.
Having White Trash Relatives That Use You As A Reference And Then Don't Pay Their Bills Sucks.
Spotting In Your Slacks But Can't Leave Work Sucks.
Wanting To Commit Homicide But Left Your Official C.S.I. Rubber Gloves At Home Sucks.
I'm Glad Today Is Almost Over.
MsAmber
Medicare Sucks.
Constantly Ringing Telephones Suck.
Menstruation Sucks.
Garbage Can Liners That You Can't Open Suck.
Childproof Bottles and Bubble packs on Midol Sucks.
People With Bad Accents Getting Impatient With Me Because I Don't Understand Them Sucks.
Tight Ass Wedding Rings That You Can't Take Off Suck.
Freakin' 30 Degree Windy Days Suck.
Brassiere Straps That Won't Stay Up Suck.
Hair In My Eyes Sucks.
Broken Cookies Suck.
Wanting Biscuits and Gravy And The Customer In Front Of You Gets The Last 2 Biscuits Sucks.
Having White Trash Relatives That Use You As A Reference And Then Don't Pay Their Bills Sucks.
Spotting In Your Slacks But Can't Leave Work Sucks.
Wanting To Commit Homicide But Left Your Official C.S.I. Rubber Gloves At Home Sucks.
I'm Glad Today Is Almost Over.
MsAmber
Friday, January 13, 2006
It's Friday! Yayyy!
I have a plethora of challenges to conquer today at work.
One of my customers called me and said her shortcut didn't work. I logged in and looked at it, and sure enough: someone had changed it to .net instead of .com It was easy to fix, and took all of 2 minutes to login and check it. She lowered her voice, conspiratorially, and said she thought her boss was getting on her computer and messing things up. I assured her that this isn't a big deal, give me a call if you need anything else. I get a call later from her co-worker, who informed me that employee said she had enough and she quit.
Over a shortcut? Because she doesn't know how to open a browser and type in an address? Or do you think it may have been because she thinks her boss is sabotaging her? hmmm...
Another customer has an internal modem that isn't working. No big deal. They will simply have to buy a USRobotics external 56k. That is what we support anyway. Since they need to be initialized in DOS, the internal modems are hit and miss.
I have a customer who says all her default DX codes are missing. Somehow I doubt that, but I will log in and get a backup of her database to find out what happened to them. I think they may have deleted them, but the database will tell...
Medicare is giving me nightmares. One state wants the numbers in box 24K and 33pin, another state wants one number in 24K and another number in 33pin. Another state says: If there is a number in box 33group, then DON'T put a number in 33pin, but it still needs to be in 24K.
Medicare is Federal! How can they change requirements all the time? Aaaargh!
I work with software developers. I test and support a Beta product.
One of my big challenges is duplicating an error. When a customer calls with a problem, I need to duplicate that problem in order to report it. The programmers will kick the ticket back to me if they don't have enough information. Sometimes, It's easier just to get into SQL and manipulate the tables to make the issue go away. They don't like for me to do that very often, but some of my customers ask me to anyway. "Amber, would you just get into the tables and remove this transaction?" I'm always getting into trouble. C'est La Vie.
Here is a joke:
A Manager, an Engineer, and a Programmer were driving down the road. All of a sudden the brakes went out. They were able to get the car stopped in a grassy area, so no-one was hurt. They get out of the car. The Manager says: "Let's have a meeting and assign an independent panel to figure out what went wrong." The Engineer says: "No, Let's take apart the entire brake system and find the problem and repair it." The Programmer says: "Let's push the car back up the hill and see if it happens again."
MsAmber
One of my customers called me and said her shortcut didn't work. I logged in and looked at it, and sure enough: someone had changed it to .net instead of .com It was easy to fix, and took all of 2 minutes to login and check it. She lowered her voice, conspiratorially, and said she thought her boss was getting on her computer and messing things up. I assured her that this isn't a big deal, give me a call if you need anything else. I get a call later from her co-worker, who informed me that employee said she had enough and she quit.
Over a shortcut? Because she doesn't know how to open a browser and type in an address? Or do you think it may have been because she thinks her boss is sabotaging her? hmmm...
Another customer has an internal modem that isn't working. No big deal. They will simply have to buy a USRobotics external 56k. That is what we support anyway. Since they need to be initialized in DOS, the internal modems are hit and miss.
I have a customer who says all her default DX codes are missing. Somehow I doubt that, but I will log in and get a backup of her database to find out what happened to them. I think they may have deleted them, but the database will tell...
Medicare is giving me nightmares. One state wants the numbers in box 24K and 33pin, another state wants one number in 24K and another number in 33pin. Another state says: If there is a number in box 33group, then DON'T put a number in 33pin, but it still needs to be in 24K.
Medicare is Federal! How can they change requirements all the time? Aaaargh!
I work with software developers. I test and support a Beta product.
One of my big challenges is duplicating an error. When a customer calls with a problem, I need to duplicate that problem in order to report it. The programmers will kick the ticket back to me if they don't have enough information. Sometimes, It's easier just to get into SQL and manipulate the tables to make the issue go away. They don't like for me to do that very often, but some of my customers ask me to anyway. "Amber, would you just get into the tables and remove this transaction?" I'm always getting into trouble. C'est La Vie.
Here is a joke:
A Manager, an Engineer, and a Programmer were driving down the road. All of a sudden the brakes went out. They were able to get the car stopped in a grassy area, so no-one was hurt. They get out of the car. The Manager says: "Let's have a meeting and assign an independent panel to figure out what went wrong." The Engineer says: "No, Let's take apart the entire brake system and find the problem and repair it." The Programmer says: "Let's push the car back up the hill and see if it happens again."
MsAmber
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
This is one of my typical backboards. Yes, this is all my wiring. The Nitsuko phone system, the network patchpanel at the bottom. The Comswitch and the Stick (both lineshare devices), and all the pretty little jumpers that are laced up, down and around. The orange cover on the 66M150 block means that it is the end of the Phone Company's responsibility. I take it from there, and create the artwork that is my backboard.
This was a new-construction home wiring job that I did for a friend (meaning: free).
Wired for 6.1 surround-sound. Bottom patch panel is all Speaker Runs.
Cable TV repeater with cable drops in every room.
Can you see the surge protection on the phone lines? 4 pair to every phone jack.
12 network drops, modem, router, switch on shelf in closet
That is a toilet flange I used as a cable duct to the attic.
Pretty huh?
I Miss My Trade...
I used to run cable. Most of you already know that, but for those of you who don't:
I used to run cable. I run coax, cat 5, cat 3, fiber innerduct and fiber. I terminated (put ends on) and tested just about everything. Including the OLD timey cabling. The old 25pair amphenols for the old key phone systems, twinax, video cables, alarm cables, intercom/speaker systems. I even worked with electricians as an apprentice (I.B.E.W.)for a year. I ran romex and installed balast lamps in suspended ceilings, and wired outlets. I can get a cable from here to there. It's an art, and I'm particularly gifted.
I earned my title as a Bicsi RCDD, which means Registered Communications Distribution Designer.
I crawled up in ceilings, walked across roofs, lifted up to poles, crawled under buildings. I worked in Churches, Offices, Stores, trailers, truck shops, schools, even in the pullboxes beside the highway. You never know where next. My favorite is pulling cables in old 1920's buildings. Some cool stuff hiding behind the drop ceilings and fake walls. I always came home dirty and tired. Some of my favorite clothes still have insulation embedded in the fibers.
I invested thousands of dollars in tools over the years. The more tools you have, the more you are worth in the job market.
I also installed, programmed and serviced several brands of telephone systems. I started out with ComDial, Toshiba DK, Lucent/AT&T Merlin, then graduated up to NEC/Nitsuko, Panasonic KXTD, and Nortel. I can chase and troubleshoot dialtone all over the place. Betcha I can chase YOUR pair all the way back to the Central Office without a map. Alright, that may be a stretch, depending on how populated your area, but it's very likely that I can.
A couple of years ago, I had several physical problems pile up on me. When I crawled under a building, I had heartburn so bad, it was agony. So I went to the doc and they scoped my stomach and showed me pictures of my ulcer and my eroded esophagus. I went on HEAVY antibiotics and antacids to target the H.Pylori bacteria that was eating up my stomach. (I let it go too long, apparently.)
Then I fell backwards out of my worktruck and landed on the back of my head. I didn't lose consciousness, just had a brain scan and some X-rays. I had a concussion with a lot of swelling in my skull. It also knocked the little cholesterol stones in my ears out of whack. I had vertigo. I worked through it, but I swear it bothered me for a year and a half. Made me shaky on extension ladders, but I did it anyway.
I had a spot of skin-cancer on my nose that started to get a little obnoxious. It was bleeding and wouldn't go away. They cut and cauterized a big chunk out of the side of my nose. It was "Squamous". Yippee. Of all the damn places!
Then, my back was bothering me. Not like I pulled a muscle, well, kinda like a pulled muscle, but not on my back - IN my back. Turns out I had two cysts the size of tennis balls in there, on my ovaries and tubes, that were pushing on my back. So, they removed that, along with my chances of having children.
All along, I had a problem where I felt sick everytime I ate. I thought it was my ulcer, since they had found that, I figured it would solve a lot of my eating problems. I asked the doc when my ulcer would be healed. He tested me again. I STILL had H.Pylori, so I had to take the stupid Antibiotic/Antacid box of pills again. They did a nuclear test of my gallbladder. Hey! Guess what? It hasn't been working either. So they took that out. The nice surgeon fixed a hernia while he was there, as a bonus operation.
Well, It's been almost a year since my last operation. The only disposable organs I have left are my tonsils and breasts (I'm keeping them, by the way). I feel good now. Good enough to get back into the field, BUT I've started a new career. I've been in Medical Office Tech Support for 16 months, and I'm getting pretty good at it. I couldn't just quit and get back out in the field. How would my customers ever manage without me?
Decisions, decisions, decisions.
Oh, and my RCDD will need to be renewed in December of 2006. Should I study just in case?
MsAmber
P.S. - Just to be fair to the other people who have a stake in my decision. Family and friends appear to think that these health problems are "signs" that I need to slow down. I'm 35 year old female and my contemporaries' average: 23/male.
I used to run cable. I run coax, cat 5, cat 3, fiber innerduct and fiber. I terminated (put ends on) and tested just about everything. Including the OLD timey cabling. The old 25pair amphenols for the old key phone systems, twinax, video cables, alarm cables, intercom/speaker systems. I even worked with electricians as an apprentice (I.B.E.W.)for a year. I ran romex and installed balast lamps in suspended ceilings, and wired outlets. I can get a cable from here to there. It's an art, and I'm particularly gifted.
I earned my title as a Bicsi RCDD, which means Registered Communications Distribution Designer.
I crawled up in ceilings, walked across roofs, lifted up to poles, crawled under buildings. I worked in Churches, Offices, Stores, trailers, truck shops, schools, even in the pullboxes beside the highway. You never know where next. My favorite is pulling cables in old 1920's buildings. Some cool stuff hiding behind the drop ceilings and fake walls. I always came home dirty and tired. Some of my favorite clothes still have insulation embedded in the fibers.
I invested thousands of dollars in tools over the years. The more tools you have, the more you are worth in the job market.
I also installed, programmed and serviced several brands of telephone systems. I started out with ComDial, Toshiba DK, Lucent/AT&T Merlin, then graduated up to NEC/Nitsuko, Panasonic KXTD, and Nortel. I can chase and troubleshoot dialtone all over the place. Betcha I can chase YOUR pair all the way back to the Central Office without a map. Alright, that may be a stretch, depending on how populated your area, but it's very likely that I can.
A couple of years ago, I had several physical problems pile up on me. When I crawled under a building, I had heartburn so bad, it was agony. So I went to the doc and they scoped my stomach and showed me pictures of my ulcer and my eroded esophagus. I went on HEAVY antibiotics and antacids to target the H.Pylori bacteria that was eating up my stomach. (I let it go too long, apparently.)
Then I fell backwards out of my worktruck and landed on the back of my head. I didn't lose consciousness, just had a brain scan and some X-rays. I had a concussion with a lot of swelling in my skull. It also knocked the little cholesterol stones in my ears out of whack. I had vertigo. I worked through it, but I swear it bothered me for a year and a half. Made me shaky on extension ladders, but I did it anyway.
I had a spot of skin-cancer on my nose that started to get a little obnoxious. It was bleeding and wouldn't go away. They cut and cauterized a big chunk out of the side of my nose. It was "Squamous". Yippee. Of all the damn places!
Then, my back was bothering me. Not like I pulled a muscle, well, kinda like a pulled muscle, but not on my back - IN my back. Turns out I had two cysts the size of tennis balls in there, on my ovaries and tubes, that were pushing on my back. So, they removed that, along with my chances of having children.
All along, I had a problem where I felt sick everytime I ate. I thought it was my ulcer, since they had found that, I figured it would solve a lot of my eating problems. I asked the doc when my ulcer would be healed. He tested me again. I STILL had H.Pylori, so I had to take the stupid Antibiotic/Antacid box of pills again. They did a nuclear test of my gallbladder. Hey! Guess what? It hasn't been working either. So they took that out. The nice surgeon fixed a hernia while he was there, as a bonus operation.
Well, It's been almost a year since my last operation. The only disposable organs I have left are my tonsils and breasts (I'm keeping them, by the way). I feel good now. Good enough to get back into the field, BUT I've started a new career. I've been in Medical Office Tech Support for 16 months, and I'm getting pretty good at it. I couldn't just quit and get back out in the field. How would my customers ever manage without me?
Decisions, decisions, decisions.
Oh, and my RCDD will need to be renewed in December of 2006. Should I study just in case?
MsAmber
P.S. - Just to be fair to the other people who have a stake in my decision. Family and friends appear to think that these health problems are "signs" that I need to slow down. I'm 35 year old female and my contemporaries' average: 23/male.
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
Guitar practice.
My guitar teacher is Johnny Garrett. Seems like a really cool guy. He certainly acts like he wants to be the best guitar teacher. He's got me practicing 5 different finger positions. And strumming.
My left hand is seriously cramping up. When I have to spread my fingers, they kinda lock up on me. I don't have a problem with A, D, or E (well, I kinda do). But C and G are kicking my butt.
So, I'm taking a break and eating a liver and muenster sandwich with potato chips and a green apple Smirnoff Twister.
I set my amp next to my chair, and I can reach the controls easily. I have the perfect little cubby behind my chair to stash the guitar.
I've got strong but stubby hands. Short fingers. I have to tilt the guitar face away from me to reach all the strings. So now, I just need to stop watching my fingers.
Okay. Sandwich done. Time to try those chords again.
Wish me luck.
MsAmber
My left hand is seriously cramping up. When I have to spread my fingers, they kinda lock up on me. I don't have a problem with A, D, or E (well, I kinda do). But C and G are kicking my butt.
So, I'm taking a break and eating a liver and muenster sandwich with potato chips and a green apple Smirnoff Twister.
I set my amp next to my chair, and I can reach the controls easily. I have the perfect little cubby behind my chair to stash the guitar.
I've got strong but stubby hands. Short fingers. I have to tilt the guitar face away from me to reach all the strings. So now, I just need to stop watching my fingers.
Okay. Sandwich done. Time to try those chords again.
Wish me luck.
MsAmber
Monday, January 09, 2006
A Quick and Dirty IQ Test
| Your IQ Is 120 |
 Your Logical Intelligence is Below Average Your Verbal Intelligence is Exceptional Your Mathematical Intelligence is Exceptional Your General Knowledge is Exceptional |
Now I know. My Logical Intelligence is Below Average.
I think that test was rigged.
Somebody please take this test and share, ok?
MsAmber
A Dream
Halfway up a hill is a big three story unpainted house. The mailbox is at the bottom of the hill, there is a mudpuddle driveway leading up to the house and past, to the top of the hill. The weather is cold and wet, the sky is dreary. There are no visible colors. I guess this dream is like sepia toned?
This house is old and disorganized inside. There's junk everywhere. Useless junk. A piece of a broken rusty chain, horseshoes, a table with a splintered leg. It's like looking at the contents of a junk drawer, and everything is rusty.
I walk up the hill to see my alligators. They are in cement cells, submerged in a pond. I walk along the tops of the walls. Almost like walking a balance beam or a railroad track. The water below in each of the cells is dark and there are some weeds growing up out of the water and in the cracks in the concrete. The alligators are watching me, but they know who I am. I'm the one who feeds them. I feel annoyed that I'm stuck taking care of them. I resent them.
I walk back down to the house, where I have just finished making Thanksgiving dinner. (I have no memory of doing the actual work, but you know how dreams are...) I have set up the picnic tables in a row out back. I can see out the kitchen, through the laundry room, out the back door, straight to the banquet. I see big mounds of dirt have gotten closer to the patio. I think to myself: "Alright, I've had it. They're sneaking up on my Turkey! I'm going to shoot them once and for all!" (The alligators in disguise).
So, I go upstairs to a bedroom where the old man and old woman are asleep in their bed. I open the big wooden dirty gun cabinet. I see a rifle with a busted stock, a rifle with no hammer, a shotgun that MIGHT work, but I can't find the right kind of cartridges. I've got quite a pile of gun-junk spread around me, but I can't put a gun and a bullet together. I look over and see a snake crawling up the side of the bed. I calmly reach over and snatch it by the neck. I squeeze it's head. It's jaw bends completely sideways and it's head flattens out, but when I release the pressure, it all springs back into place. I tried to squeeze it's head off again. Still didn't work. So I decide to cut it's head off with a knife. I know I have a knife in my purse. I carry the snake to the hall table where my purse sits. I dump my purse out. There is a black knife, no. A swiss army knife, no. A pen-knife, no. Where is my Silver Knife? For some reason I was very upset that I couldn't find my Silver Knife. No other knife would do.
I was annoyed AND frustrated at this point.
And I woke up.
Note:
The house appears in many of my dreams as does the alligator pond and the old man.
I get the feeling that this has something to do with my attitude of "I'm tired of doing stuff without the proper tools!" Which is my rant when I bust my knuckles while trying to fix something.
But why wouldn't I consider any other knife?
And I can always go yell at the alligators and they will go back to their cells. (In my mind, they are like annoying dogs)
Psychoanalyze This.
MsAmber
This house is old and disorganized inside. There's junk everywhere. Useless junk. A piece of a broken rusty chain, horseshoes, a table with a splintered leg. It's like looking at the contents of a junk drawer, and everything is rusty.
I walk up the hill to see my alligators. They are in cement cells, submerged in a pond. I walk along the tops of the walls. Almost like walking a balance beam or a railroad track. The water below in each of the cells is dark and there are some weeds growing up out of the water and in the cracks in the concrete. The alligators are watching me, but they know who I am. I'm the one who feeds them. I feel annoyed that I'm stuck taking care of them. I resent them.
I walk back down to the house, where I have just finished making Thanksgiving dinner. (I have no memory of doing the actual work, but you know how dreams are...) I have set up the picnic tables in a row out back. I can see out the kitchen, through the laundry room, out the back door, straight to the banquet. I see big mounds of dirt have gotten closer to the patio. I think to myself: "Alright, I've had it. They're sneaking up on my Turkey! I'm going to shoot them once and for all!" (The alligators in disguise).
So, I go upstairs to a bedroom where the old man and old woman are asleep in their bed. I open the big wooden dirty gun cabinet. I see a rifle with a busted stock, a rifle with no hammer, a shotgun that MIGHT work, but I can't find the right kind of cartridges. I've got quite a pile of gun-junk spread around me, but I can't put a gun and a bullet together. I look over and see a snake crawling up the side of the bed. I calmly reach over and snatch it by the neck. I squeeze it's head. It's jaw bends completely sideways and it's head flattens out, but when I release the pressure, it all springs back into place. I tried to squeeze it's head off again. Still didn't work. So I decide to cut it's head off with a knife. I know I have a knife in my purse. I carry the snake to the hall table where my purse sits. I dump my purse out. There is a black knife, no. A swiss army knife, no. A pen-knife, no. Where is my Silver Knife? For some reason I was very upset that I couldn't find my Silver Knife. No other knife would do.
I was annoyed AND frustrated at this point.
And I woke up.
Note:
The house appears in many of my dreams as does the alligator pond and the old man.
I get the feeling that this has something to do with my attitude of "I'm tired of doing stuff without the proper tools!" Which is my rant when I bust my knuckles while trying to fix something.
But why wouldn't I consider any other knife?
And I can always go yell at the alligators and they will go back to their cells. (In my mind, they are like annoying dogs)
Psychoanalyze This.
MsAmber
6th Grade Social Studies - Chapters 1-5
Ok. Last night I helped a 6th grader study for a Social Studies test covering Ancient Egypt. The things I learned: (and no, I don't have the book today.)
The Nile is 4000 miles long. It travels North from Africa as two rivers. The White Nile and the Blue Nile. They come together near a city named Khartoum in modern-day Sudan.
After the two Niles form the Great Nile, there is a great big "S". This S-shape in the river is Upper Nubia and Lower Nubia. (Lower Nubia being North of Upper Nubia) The Nubian part of the Nile river has 6 areas of Rapids. These rapids are called Cataracts. The Northernmost cataract is the border of Nubia and Egypt. The cataracts keep the Nile from being navigable by boat. So the Nubians created a trade route across land. The Nubian area of the Nile only has two miles of farmable land on either side of the river, so trade is important.
North of the first cataract is Upper Egypt. It has steep cliffs alongside the river, so it isn't farmable land either. Then, North of Upper Egypt is Lower Egypt. It has 6 miles of farmable land on either side of the river, then it becomes a fertile Delta area where the river dumps into the Mediteranean Sea. Annual flooding of the Nile river brings silt from the mountains in Africa, which enriches the soil and makes it fertile for farming. Lower Egypt is called Black Egypt because of the soil. Upper Egypt is called Red Egypt because of the sand and rocks which make up the mountains. Egypt is protected by the Sahara Desert to the West and the Eastern Desert to the East.
Ancient Egypt had 31 Dynasties; families who ruled. And in the time between 2700 b.c. to 32 b.c., there were three Kingdoms (time eras). In the Old kingdom: the first Dynasty was started by Pharoa Menes, who united the two Egypts. This Unity lasted 2000 years. This is also when the Pyramids were built. The Middle Kingdom was marked by a period of peace and arts. The New Kingdom had some interesting characters. King Tutankhamen for one. A female Pharoah named Hatshepsut (HotCheapSuit) became pharoah in 1503 b.c. She was a Regent for her stepson, but she wouldn't let him take the throne when he came of age. She ruled for 22 years. When she died, her stepson Thutmosis III (Thut mow suh) had all her statues destroyed. He turned out to be a very good Pharoah, showing mercy to those he conquered.
In 332 b.c. Alexander the Great from Greece vanquished Egypt. 300 years after that: Rome took it.
The Egyptians worshipped Amon Ra, Osiris, and Isis. Amon Ra is represented by the sun, Osiris is the god of life and death, and Isis is the goddess of health. The ancient Egyptians thought that when a person died, they rowed their boat into the West to meet and dine and party with other dead people. So the people were superstitious about being on the West side of the River when the sun went down. Also, all the pyramids were oriented with their sides to the N., S., E., and W. perfectly. The pyramids were also built on the West side of the River. The Great Pyramid at Giza is the tomb of the Menes pharoah dynasty.
She made a 75. Go figure.
MsAmber
The Nile is 4000 miles long. It travels North from Africa as two rivers. The White Nile and the Blue Nile. They come together near a city named Khartoum in modern-day Sudan.
After the two Niles form the Great Nile, there is a great big "S". This S-shape in the river is Upper Nubia and Lower Nubia. (Lower Nubia being North of Upper Nubia) The Nubian part of the Nile river has 6 areas of Rapids. These rapids are called Cataracts. The Northernmost cataract is the border of Nubia and Egypt. The cataracts keep the Nile from being navigable by boat. So the Nubians created a trade route across land. The Nubian area of the Nile only has two miles of farmable land on either side of the river, so trade is important.
North of the first cataract is Upper Egypt. It has steep cliffs alongside the river, so it isn't farmable land either. Then, North of Upper Egypt is Lower Egypt. It has 6 miles of farmable land on either side of the river, then it becomes a fertile Delta area where the river dumps into the Mediteranean Sea. Annual flooding of the Nile river brings silt from the mountains in Africa, which enriches the soil and makes it fertile for farming. Lower Egypt is called Black Egypt because of the soil. Upper Egypt is called Red Egypt because of the sand and rocks which make up the mountains. Egypt is protected by the Sahara Desert to the West and the Eastern Desert to the East.
Ancient Egypt had 31 Dynasties; families who ruled. And in the time between 2700 b.c. to 32 b.c., there were three Kingdoms (time eras). In the Old kingdom: the first Dynasty was started by Pharoa Menes, who united the two Egypts. This Unity lasted 2000 years. This is also when the Pyramids were built. The Middle Kingdom was marked by a period of peace and arts. The New Kingdom had some interesting characters. King Tutankhamen for one. A female Pharoah named Hatshepsut (HotCheapSuit) became pharoah in 1503 b.c. She was a Regent for her stepson, but she wouldn't let him take the throne when he came of age. She ruled for 22 years. When she died, her stepson Thutmosis III (Thut mow suh) had all her statues destroyed. He turned out to be a very good Pharoah, showing mercy to those he conquered.
In 332 b.c. Alexander the Great from Greece vanquished Egypt. 300 years after that: Rome took it.
The Egyptians worshipped Amon Ra, Osiris, and Isis. Amon Ra is represented by the sun, Osiris is the god of life and death, and Isis is the goddess of health. The ancient Egyptians thought that when a person died, they rowed their boat into the West to meet and dine and party with other dead people. So the people were superstitious about being on the West side of the River when the sun went down. Also, all the pyramids were oriented with their sides to the N., S., E., and W. perfectly. The pyramids were also built on the West side of the River. The Great Pyramid at Giza is the tomb of the Menes pharoah dynasty.
She made a 75. Go figure.
MsAmber
Sunday, January 08, 2006
King Kong on the Big, Big, Big Screen
What a nice date. Rob took me to our favorite Sushi restaurant. We had the "Love Boat". It has 18 pieces sushi mori, a california roll, and a spicy crab roll. With a bowl of seaweed and tofu soup. Lots of wasabi. Mmm, mmm, good. We actually couldn't eat it all.
Then he had a surprise lined out. We drove up to Bricktown (the entertainment area of the City). We went to the Harkins Capri theater. They have the largest screen in all of Oklahoma, and a 40,000 watt sound system, where we reclined in comfort in rocking chairs in an uncrowded theater for the awesome showing of "King Kong".
Now, we rarely go see a movie at the theater. Preferring to wait until it comes out on DVD and we can watch it from the comfort of our home. But if you are going to watch "King Kong", I suggest doing it on a big, big, big screen. The dinosaur stampeed and the T-Rex battle were AWESOME! And flying through the canyons and then flying around the Empire State Building caused serious vertigo. What a cool piece of film. We now understand why their production costs were so monumental.
Don't waste your time or money seeing it at a normal theater. See if you can find a Harkins theater in your area. It's worth it for this movie.
Harkins theaters are designed for higher-end movie enjoyment. It's the "yuppie" theater. No trash on the floors, stadium seating, reclining chairs, plenty of legroom. You can even lift up your armrest so you and your date can cuddle. Nice. And the Screen is gargantuan. It is wider than my backyard. We were comparing it to our back fence. I think the Emcee said it was over 80 feet wide? Nice.
My hubby is such a cool guy. (For a nerd).
MsAmber
Then he had a surprise lined out. We drove up to Bricktown (the entertainment area of the City). We went to the Harkins Capri theater. They have the largest screen in all of Oklahoma, and a 40,000 watt sound system, where we reclined in comfort in rocking chairs in an uncrowded theater for the awesome showing of "King Kong".
Now, we rarely go see a movie at the theater. Preferring to wait until it comes out on DVD and we can watch it from the comfort of our home. But if you are going to watch "King Kong", I suggest doing it on a big, big, big screen. The dinosaur stampeed and the T-Rex battle were AWESOME! And flying through the canyons and then flying around the Empire State Building caused serious vertigo. What a cool piece of film. We now understand why their production costs were so monumental.
Don't waste your time or money seeing it at a normal theater. See if you can find a Harkins theater in your area. It's worth it for this movie.
Harkins theaters are designed for higher-end movie enjoyment. It's the "yuppie" theater. No trash on the floors, stadium seating, reclining chairs, plenty of legroom. You can even lift up your armrest so you and your date can cuddle. Nice. And the Screen is gargantuan. It is wider than my backyard. We were comparing it to our back fence. I think the Emcee said it was over 80 feet wide? Nice.
My hubby is such a cool guy. (For a nerd).
MsAmber
Saturday, January 07, 2006
My Hired-Girl.
This is Kandelyn. She has been on the payroll here since July 2005. She is 11, and a lovely little gabby thing. She took over after the other three neighborhood girls moved away. She likes horses and anything with wheels. She insists that she is in line to inherit my Mazda Miata convertible (IF anything Should Happen to me.)
She is saving to go to Horse Camp again in 2006. I sat down with her and showed her how much she would have to save every week, and made arrangements for her to work regularly to stay on schedule. I am very proud of her. Since July 2005, she has saved $362.74 towards her goal of $650.00.
I am Jewish, so I have a rule: the house is to be cleaned by sundown on Friday, then when I light the Sabbath light, all work stops. Every Friday, without fail, she shows up to do her chores.
1. Wash the dog dishes.
2. Unload the dishwasher.
3. Reload the dishwasher and wipe all counters, backsplash, and comet the sinks. Put the rags in the washing machine.
4. Sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
5. Vaccuum the carpets. Both bedrooms, hallway, and livingroom.
6. Change the sheets, powder and remake the beds. Put the sheets in the washing machine and start it.
7. Pick up and dust the end tables in the living room.
8. Shake out the rugs and put them back.
9. Re-fill the dog dishes and water bucket.
10. Windex the Television, computer monitor, and the front glass door.
She is not allowed to do a partial job. I reserve the right to make her do anything over if she doesn't do it well. (I've only had to do that a couple of times.)
Meanwhile, I'm running around catching the slack. I do the bathrooms, the trash, the kitty litter, the dusting, and filling and cleaning the Sabbath lantern.
Last night, I heard her say "Damn!" I came out of the bathroom to see what was wrong. She had left the door open when she mopped and the dog trampled over her freshly mopped floor. It was funny. Kandelyn was wearing an apron, holding a mop, and fussing at the dog with a distinct row of dog prints on a freshly mopped floor. The image was just too much. I laughed. It looked like a "Norman Rockwell" moment.
All her chores take an hour to complete, and she makes $10.00. She has a system, and she never veers from it. She does a great job. She confessed to me that two weeks ago, she cheated a little bit, and never rinsed her mop. She mopped the whole floor without ever rinsing. It's funny that she felt guilty about that. She knows I make her rinse her mop at least four times while mopping.
She joins me for the lighting of the Sabbath and the prayer. In fact, she insists that it's time to light it, even when I won't quit cleaning. She's so serious about it.
I'm proud of Kandelyn. She's a hard worker, and she does a good job, and I'm proud also of her honesty. She has come a long way in the last 8 months.
Last Summer, she was 10 and too small to mow the whole yard by herself, but she wanted the money, so we let her help Rob with the mowing. She got strong enough to do the whole yard, but Rob and I won't let her remove and replace the bagger. Somebody still has to do that for her. She makes $10.00 for the front yard and $20.00 for the back yard.
She's measuring the grass right now, trying to convince us that the yard needs mowed.
If you can find a 10 or 11 year old girl to hire, I recommend it highly. This arrangement has been beneficial for her and for us. Not to mention fun. I also enjoy helping her with her homework afterwards, or if there is none, we catch up on all our Little House on the Prairies.
I tutored her in reading last school year, we read Little House. She had never seen the television shows. I introduced her to them, and she is hooked. It's like her very own Soap-opera. She cried when Bunny died, and when Mary went blind, and she gets all upset when Nelly does something to Laura. It's my favorite part of the week.
MsAmber
Friday, January 06, 2006
Political Weathervane Test. Which way does your wind blow?
| You are a Social Moderate (55% permissive) and an... Economic Liberal (35% permissive) You are best described as a:
Link: The Politics Test on OkCupid Free Online Dating Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test |
Ummmm. Ok.
MsAmber
It's Sci-Fi Friday! Yaaaay!
My DVR is dutifully recording the newest episodes of "Star Gate SG1", "Star Gate Atlantis", and "Battlestar Galactica". Unfortunately, I'm watching the music channel. Like last season, I have to wait until Rob and I can watch them together. I pinky-swore. Damn my honorable self. Can't I just peek? Nope. I told him I'd wait. Why did I even agree to wait? It's not like I would blurt out the ending and ruin it for him. It's his own dern fault for working an evening shift. If he were a NORMAL person, he would go to work in the morning, and we would be able to watch them together. But Nooooo. And when he gets home, I have just enough energy to watch ONE episode. Then I must go to bed, being as I've already had an 18 hour day, so we wind up watching the other two on Saturday. That's just WRONG, dude.
We do this every year. My only reprieve is during the Summer when the 'season' is over. We save the final episode so we can watch it again just before the new 'season' begins. We watched "Battlestar Galactica" again monday last.
See what a Good Wife I have been?
I think you owe me dinner this weekend, Dear. (In a sit-down restaurant.)
MsAmber
We do this every year. My only reprieve is during the Summer when the 'season' is over. We save the final episode so we can watch it again just before the new 'season' begins. We watched "Battlestar Galactica" again monday last.
See what a Good Wife I have been?
I think you owe me dinner this weekend, Dear. (In a sit-down restaurant.)
MsAmber
Thursday, January 05, 2006
Baha'i ? Carole Lombard's Faith...
Lets discuss Baha'i. It's a faith. A religion, if you will.
I read about it and was really intrigued. I did a Google search for Carole Lombard, and the article mentioned that she was a second-generation Baha'i. What's a Baha'i?
Partial quote from the article: "The independent search after truth, unfettered by superstition or tradition; the oneness of the entire human race, the pivotal principle and fundamental doctrine of the Faith; the basic unity of all religions; the condemnation of all forms of prejudice, whether religious, racial, class or national; the harmony which must exist between religion and science; the equality of men and women, the two wings on which the bird of human kind is able to soar; the introduction of compulsory education; the adoption of a universal auxiliary language; the abolition of the extremes of wealth and poverty; the institution of a world tribunal for the adjudication of disputes between nations; the exaltation of work, performed in the spirit of service, to the rank of worship; the glorification of justice as the ruling principle in human society, and of religion as a bulwark for the protection of all peoples and nations; and the establishment of a permanent and universal peace as the supreme goal of all mankind—these stand out as the essential elements (of Baha'i)."
They also are monotheistic (one God), but they recognize all of the "messengers" (Abraham, Jesus, Mohammed, Krishna, Buddha, Moses.). They believe in a "Progressive Revelation" which essentially means: truths will be revealed over time. And thirdly, they believe in the unity of mankind.
I wonder why I've never heard of this faith... We've heard of Scientology, and the plethora of names by which the protestants huddle under, Islam (ism?), Buddhism, Catholicism, Judaism, Hinduism, Taoism, Don't Look Here-ism, Mormonism, etc., etc., etc.
My surprise came when I saw that it is a close relative of Islam.
What do you know?
MsAmber
I read about it and was really intrigued. I did a Google search for Carole Lombard, and the article mentioned that she was a second-generation Baha'i. What's a Baha'i?
Partial quote from the article: "The independent search after truth, unfettered by superstition or tradition; the oneness of the entire human race, the pivotal principle and fundamental doctrine of the Faith; the basic unity of all religions; the condemnation of all forms of prejudice, whether religious, racial, class or national; the harmony which must exist between religion and science; the equality of men and women, the two wings on which the bird of human kind is able to soar; the introduction of compulsory education; the adoption of a universal auxiliary language; the abolition of the extremes of wealth and poverty; the institution of a world tribunal for the adjudication of disputes between nations; the exaltation of work, performed in the spirit of service, to the rank of worship; the glorification of justice as the ruling principle in human society, and of religion as a bulwark for the protection of all peoples and nations; and the establishment of a permanent and universal peace as the supreme goal of all mankind—these stand out as the essential elements (of Baha'i)."
They also are monotheistic (one God), but they recognize all of the "messengers" (Abraham, Jesus, Mohammed, Krishna, Buddha, Moses.). They believe in a "Progressive Revelation" which essentially means: truths will be revealed over time. And thirdly, they believe in the unity of mankind.
I wonder why I've never heard of this faith... We've heard of Scientology, and the plethora of names by which the protestants huddle under, Islam (ism?), Buddhism, Catholicism, Judaism, Hinduism, Taoism, Don't Look Here-ism, Mormonism, etc., etc., etc.
My surprise came when I saw that it is a close relative of Islam.
What do you know?
MsAmber
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Katharine Hepburn? Cool.
| Katharine Hepburn You scored 16% grit, 33% wit, 38% flair, and 19% class! |
| You are the fabulously quirky and independent woman of character. You go your own way, follow your own drummer, take your own lead. You stand head and shoulders next to your partner, but you are perfectly willing and able to stand alone. Others might be more classically beautiful or conventionally woman-like, but you possess a more fundamental common sense and off-kilter charm, making interesting men fall at your feet. You can pick them up or leave them there as you see fit. You share the screen with the likes of Spencer Tracy and Cary Grant, thinking men who like strong women. Find out what kind of classic dame you'd be by taking the The Classic Dames Test written by gidgetgoes |
I am so glad I am likened to Katharine Hepburn. She is really the only classic movie star that I like. I was worried that I would get Bette Davis or Joan Crawford.
MsAmber
Amber's Pet Hospital. How can I help you?
I got home today, looking forward to microwaving some fried rice and watching several episodes of Little House on the Prairie.
The phone rings. It's not a number that I recognize... I answer it anyway.
"Miss Amber? This is Kandelyn. Me and Jon are at Caley's house. Her puppy got attacked by some other dogs and we didn't know who to call... Can we come over?"
So she brought the puppy to my house. I met them in the street, because by the sound of her voice, I could tell she was scared.
It was a 6 week old chocolate lab female. A big dog had bitten her head. Puncture wounds on the ear, neck, jaw, and beside her left eye. The one by her eye is pretty large. If it were a human, I would recommend stitches. There was a considerable amount of blood, and the pup was traumatized. Her eyes were red and bloodshot, and she was shaking. I held her and tried to wipe the dirt away to see the extent of her wounds. The pup started squealing. Aww. Poor thing. The kids were getting very upset about the puppy's cries. My shirt was already ruined, so I didn't worry about getting any more blood on it. I turned on the shower and got in with the pup in my arms. I managed to get all the slobber and dried blood off her coat, she cried, but it was the fastest way to get her cleaned up. No need in dragging out the misery any longer than necessary. I packed the cuts with some soothing pet gel that's designed for open wounds, wrapped her up in a blanket, and sat in the rocking chair. She ate some Bil Jac out of my hand and I rocked her to sleep. The bleeding stopped, but the poor baby was so tired.
Finally Caley's parents got home. The pup is doing fine. The kids are definitely going to sleep like logs tonight after their very traumatizing day.
MsAmber
The phone rings. It's not a number that I recognize... I answer it anyway.
"Miss Amber? This is Kandelyn. Me and Jon are at Caley's house. Her puppy got attacked by some other dogs and we didn't know who to call... Can we come over?"
So she brought the puppy to my house. I met them in the street, because by the sound of her voice, I could tell she was scared.
It was a 6 week old chocolate lab female. A big dog had bitten her head. Puncture wounds on the ear, neck, jaw, and beside her left eye. The one by her eye is pretty large. If it were a human, I would recommend stitches. There was a considerable amount of blood, and the pup was traumatized. Her eyes were red and bloodshot, and she was shaking. I held her and tried to wipe the dirt away to see the extent of her wounds. The pup started squealing. Aww. Poor thing. The kids were getting very upset about the puppy's cries. My shirt was already ruined, so I didn't worry about getting any more blood on it. I turned on the shower and got in with the pup in my arms. I managed to get all the slobber and dried blood off her coat, she cried, but it was the fastest way to get her cleaned up. No need in dragging out the misery any longer than necessary. I packed the cuts with some soothing pet gel that's designed for open wounds, wrapped her up in a blanket, and sat in the rocking chair. She ate some Bil Jac out of my hand and I rocked her to sleep. The bleeding stopped, but the poor baby was so tired.
Finally Caley's parents got home. The pup is doing fine. The kids are definitely going to sleep like logs tonight after their very traumatizing day.
MsAmber
Guitar Lessons Start Tomorrow!
I asked them if they were going to put me in a class with all the LITTLE children?
They said No, it's one-on-one private lessons.
I asked them if they taught after 5:30 pm?
They said yep, Monday through Thursday.
I asked them if they thought I should buy a left-handed guitar?
They said No, you would be limiting yourself.
I asked them if the teacher could work with a musical retard such as I?
They said no problem.
I asked how much will it cost?
They said $15.00 per session.
I start tomorrow after work. Bringing my own little electric guitar. They will teach me how to play it.
Cool.
MsAmber
They said No, it's one-on-one private lessons.
I asked them if they taught after 5:30 pm?
They said yep, Monday through Thursday.
I asked them if they thought I should buy a left-handed guitar?
They said No, you would be limiting yourself.
I asked them if the teacher could work with a musical retard such as I?
They said no problem.
I asked how much will it cost?
They said $15.00 per session.
I start tomorrow after work. Bringing my own little electric guitar. They will teach me how to play it.
Cool.
MsAmber
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Why Me? Ouch!
I donated blood again today. I think they've got it in for me. In October the girl Glenda poked me in the left arm, and I clogged the needle. So they bandaged me up and stuck the right arm. Today, they poked me in the right arm, and after twisting that huge needle around and wobbling it side-to-side, they decided to bandage it up and go after the left arm.
I'm beginning to look like a junkie just from donating. The damn needles are bigger than pencil-lead. They always bruise me, and now they are leaving puncture scars. May as well rub some India ink into the hole to tattoo it. That way the girls won't have to search for the vein each time.
Good Grief. I should go to work as a phlebotomist. I'm sure I could do it easier and more accurately than OBI.
But I DO love the t-shirts they give, and the neon pink bandage, and the brownies with nuts, and the mountain dew, and the hour off work, and ...
I'm beginning to look like a junkie just from donating. The damn needles are bigger than pencil-lead. They always bruise me, and now they are leaving puncture scars. May as well rub some India ink into the hole to tattoo it. That way the girls won't have to search for the vein each time.
Good Grief. I should go to work as a phlebotomist. I'm sure I could do it easier and more accurately than OBI.
But I DO love the t-shirts they give, and the neon pink bandage, and the brownies with nuts, and the mountain dew, and the hour off work, and ...
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Happy Happy 2006!
Another Brilliantly Successful Party.
It's 1:30 in the afternoon, and we are finally done cleaning up after the bash last night.
Not to be conceited; but I DO throw a damn good party...
Alcohol Totals:
Bottle of Old Granddad
Bottle of Jose Cuervo
20 pack Budweiser Special
6 pack Rock Green Light
6 pack Amber Bock
6 pack Smirnoff Green Apple
4 pack Strawberry Daquiries
4 pack Citrus wine coolers
4 Bottles of Champagne (2 white, 2 pink)
We played Poker all night long, and watched concert DVDs. A friend brought over one that I hadn't seen. David Bowie. Oooh. I used to sooo be in love with him. The younger couple that came said: "Isn't he the guy from 'Labyrinth'?"
Everybody said I was hot. (No, not the good-lookin' kind of hot). When they hugged me, it felt like I was running a fever and I kept wanting the doors and windows open for fresh air. While everyone else was putting on sweaters. Well, except Kathy and I. We were roasting. I think it's a middle-age thing. I remember when I was the cold one... ha ha ha.
Today, the temperature is in the mid 70's, and I have the doors and windows open to air out all the cigarette smoke.
I served snacks, chips and dips and pretzels and a bowl of candy bars, and popcorn. I made one of my famous pots of black-eyed peas with bacon. Around 10:00 pm, everyone ate a bowl of peas.
Ok. I've got the hangover thing going on now, since my chores are all done, I think I'm going to take a mid-afternoon nap.
Goodnight.
MsAmber
It's 1:30 in the afternoon, and we are finally done cleaning up after the bash last night.
Not to be conceited; but I DO throw a damn good party...
Alcohol Totals:
Bottle of Old Granddad
Bottle of Jose Cuervo
20 pack Budweiser Special
6 pack Rock Green Light
6 pack Amber Bock
6 pack Smirnoff Green Apple
4 pack Strawberry Daquiries
4 pack Citrus wine coolers
4 Bottles of Champagne (2 white, 2 pink)
We played Poker all night long, and watched concert DVDs. A friend brought over one that I hadn't seen. David Bowie. Oooh. I used to sooo be in love with him. The younger couple that came said: "Isn't he the guy from 'Labyrinth'?"
Everybody said I was hot. (No, not the good-lookin' kind of hot). When they hugged me, it felt like I was running a fever and I kept wanting the doors and windows open for fresh air. While everyone else was putting on sweaters. Well, except Kathy and I. We were roasting. I think it's a middle-age thing. I remember when I was the cold one... ha ha ha.
Today, the temperature is in the mid 70's, and I have the doors and windows open to air out all the cigarette smoke.
I served snacks, chips and dips and pretzels and a bowl of candy bars, and popcorn. I made one of my famous pots of black-eyed peas with bacon. Around 10:00 pm, everyone ate a bowl of peas.
Ok. I've got the hangover thing going on now, since my chores are all done, I think I'm going to take a mid-afternoon nap.
Goodnight.
MsAmber
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