Insecurity is very unattractive...

I am dynamic, powerful, enigmatic, confident, and self-assured.

I am competent, imaginative, caring, and a good listener.

I am hard working, honest, loyal, and practical.

I am intelligent, well-read, open-minded, and adventurous.

I walk with purpose: an important destination, with a clear rhythmic heel-toe sound.

These things are Good. I should keep them.



I worry about my weight.(I'm 140)

I worry about not being feminine enough. (yeah, I work with men.)

I shop when I'm upset (Bought $300 worth of tools one night last week at 2:00 a.m., now I own two full socket sets and a dremel and a new set of diagonal cutters. Just lucky I didn't buy a power-washer.)

My "fall-in-love" thingy is broken. I break hearts with startling regularity, but not intentionally. ('nuff said.)

I chain-smoke when I'm not working. If I didn't work, I would probably smoke two packs a day.

I don't drink enough water - ever. The Most Dehydrated Person On The Planet.

I have a temper and can fire off sarcasms far too easily.

I can't forgive and forget. I may intentionally forgive, but the forget part never happens, and I have to keep reminding myself that I forgave that person. I keep revisiting a hurt and re-forgiving the person, trying to move on, but it never sticks. I need an amnesia pill. I'm holding grudges for two decades or longer.

I push people away when they get too close to my vulnerabilities. Over and over, lather, rinse, repeat.

I don't work hard enough to maintain my friendships and family relationships. I haven't even called my father for father's day last month. Thank goodness most of them know me well enough to forgive me. But still, it is just a phone-call and I still can't bring myself to do it. What's my frakkin' problem?

These things are Not Good. I should do something about them.


Is it Rosh Hashonah yet?

Have a great day.
MsAmber